Fit (#17)

Originally posted at joshuastairhime.com


He is preparing a place for me…

Sometimes you don’t fit
You aren’t aligned with the world you are living in
The masses flow in one direction, and you’re cutting across stream.
You surround yourself with people who are supposed to be like minded,
but you discover that you fit more like a floppy sock on a hand than a glove.

The spaces between your fingers are empty, as you try to grasp anything you can to find connection, protection.
You long to be tightly wrapped in a loving embrace. A glove would let you retain your dexterity, allow you to do the things you were meant for, while protecting you from damaging attacks of the outside world.

Sometimes you don’t fit. You can’t find a place to call home.
You see those around you finding peace, finding happiness, finding love.
You’ve sought those things before, but seeking, you haven’t found, and when you knock all the doors remain closed.

You’re perspectives are so unlike those around you, that you aren’t even sure you are looking at the same thing. You’ve searched for your niche, the place you fit the best, but instead of finding a fit, you find all of the places you don’t.

You aren’t the best at anything. There is always someone better than you.

You aren’t even sure what you are looking for, you just know you haven’t found it.

I’ve always heard that Jesus had gone ahead to prepare a place for us. I imagined a mansion, full of all the treasures I felt I had earned. Piles of gold laying around, resources aplenty, an endless supply of material goods.

Now I know that none of that would make me happy.

Instead, today I found hope in the place being prepared for me. It isn’t a mansion, it isn’t money, resources, honor.

It is a place that I will fit. I’ll no longer be out of place, for the place has been prepared for me. Jesus is preparing a place for me, and when that time comes, I will fit perfectly.

I will be at peace.

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